Absence

It's been more than a year since the last time I posted on this blog. 

Sorry about that. In that time, a lot of not-so-great things have happened. Outside of rideshare, my dog Lou died in January, which I'm still not entirely over. You can read about that on my main blog. With regard to rideshare, though - earnings have gone down and bored teenagers have learned how to hotwire Kias and Hyundais from YouTube and TikTok. 

I own a 2017 Kia Soul. I didn't think anyone would want it. I thought wrong:

The would-be thieves didn't actually get away with my car. They did, however, do plenty of damage to the rear passenger window, the steering column, and the ignition. They also stole the game tablet I had mounted on the passenger seat. 

I know I'm far from alone in this - literally thousands of Kia and Hyundai owners in the area - likely tens or even hundreds of thousands across the country - are dealing with the same issue right now. I've been driving a rental car for the last couple of weeks and probably won't get my own car back from the shop for another week and a half - and that's with a relatively fast shop. This happened on August 10th and some shops were saying they couldn't get to it until November. 

If you've been the victim of any sort of crime, you know how vulnerable it leaves you feeling. It sucks. It really, really sucks. That's all I'll say.

It has given me time to work on my new rideshare playlist, though. Spotify Premium is worth every penny!

Click here to listen.

Don't.

Around 3 a.m. last Saturday night, I decided to take one more ride request before throwing in the towel for the evening. The request came from 4th and Washington downtown, where I found a very drunk couple - a woman and a man - who had attended a wedding reception with a very, very open bar. 

As I began the trip, I noticed that the destination wasn't a specific street address, but rather, just a street and city. 

"Would you mind opening the app and entering your exact drop-off address for me, please?" I asked.

Instead, the woman slurred some numbers at me.

"That's great, but I need you to enter that in the app please."

"Yeah, yeah," she said, "sure."

"Psh." was the sound emitted from the man.

"What?!" demanded the woman. "What is your fucking problem?"

"My problem?" he said, "you can't even use an app right!"

"I didn't request the ride! You did! Fix it!" she said, incorrectly.

"No, Melissa," he said, "this is on your account. You requested the ride."

And thus began the longest ride of my life.

Before we even left downtown, he was belittling her for drinking too much and embarrassing him, though apparently he didn't know anyone else at this wedding reception. She, in turn, was belittling him for not paying for anything.

This was a drawn out debate. So drawn out that by the time we were on the highway, on the outskirts of downtown, the argument about who had requested the ride evolved into a pissing contest about who spends more money in the relationship.

"I spend so much money on you," she said. "You're just a mooch. You just mooch off of me. You're a parasite."

"You are so full of shit," he said. "I pay for stuff!"

"Oh yeah?" she demanded. "Like what?!"

Coming up empty after a blissful moment of silence, he retorted. "Well, maybe I'd pay for more if I didn't have to get pizza for everyone the other night!"

Clearly, this was his Excalibur. He got pizza for everyone.

"Ohhhhh, mister big shot! Getting pizza for everyone!" she screamed back at him, her words soaked in resentment. "You work at a pizza place, Jeremy!"

"I still have to pay for it!" he appealed. "I still have to pay for it, Melissa!"

"And you didn't even save me any!" she countered. 

"I saved you three pieces!"

"You know that's not enough when I'm drunk!"

"Of course not, you fat fucking cow!"

Oh damn. Shit just got real in my back seat. It then proceeded to get realer and realer. I just zoned out and drove. 

"You are a real mother fucker, Jeremy, you know that?"

I tended to agree with Melissa at this point. That was a pretty low blow. Especially from a leech like Jeremy.

"Fine, you're right, I'm sorry," he said, unconvincingly.

"You're sorry? Right. Bullshit. I don't want you coming back to my house," she said. 

"My name is on the lease!" he said. "My dog is there. He needs to be walked! I'm staying at my house!"

"Fine," she said. "Uber guy how much longer?"

We had just pulled off the highway and onto the street listed in the app.

I read their street name. 

"This doesn't look familiar," said Melissa.

"Did you update the address in the app like he asked you to?" asked Jeremy.

Look at Jeremy, making up ground. 

"What? I told him the address!" she said, and repeated it. I noticed that the address she told me had four digits. All the houses on this street had two. Definitely not a good sign.

I had to get involved. I parked the car, turned around, and addressed the assholes in the back seat.

"When I picked you up, I told you the app only had a street listed, and I asked you to update your destination to include the specific drop-off address. Do you remember that?"

"Yeah, do you fucking remember?" Jeremy interjected.

"I don't want to hear it, Jeremy," I said. 

Silently, Melissa turned to Jeremy, sneered at him, and handed me her phone.

"Can you please do it for me? I don't know how."

I entered the correct address for her - something I would have gladly done eight miles earlier.

The updated destination: six miles southeast of our location, another 14 minutes away. Son of a...

The arguments continued, though admittedly not with as much gusto as the first leg of the trip. The intensity ramped up as we approached the final - correct - destination, though.

As Melissa and Jeremy began to exit my car, both felt the need to make closing statements, because apparently I looked like I gave a fuck.

"I'm sorry he's such a piece of shit," said Melissa.

"And I'm sorry she doesn't know how to use a fucking app," said Jeremy.

Again, I turned around and addressed them. 

"First, please make sure you have all your belongings. I don't want to come back here." They double-checked the seat and the floor for keys and phones.

"Second, and more importantly, do you have kids?" I asked.

Melissa responded with a puzzled look. Jeremy simply said, "Nope!"

"Good," I said. "Don't."

Rain

I decided to go out driving last night.

This isn't too unusual for a Friday night. However, last night there were severe thunderstorms throughout the area throughout the evening and overnight, and this is going to continue throughout the day today. 

Of course, Murphy's Law would dictate that I would get a trip from the airport - at midnight on a Friday - all the way out to O'Fallon, Missouri. This took me through the heart of the storm. The same storm that killed a 12 year old girl on the highway at the very same airport I had just left an hour earlier, when, for reasons unknown, the adult driving the car she was in decided to do a U-turn on the entrance ramp, causing the car to be swept away by a flash flood. 

I'm not going to point out what the driver did wrong, as that won't bring anyone back. Besides, I wasn't there, and I can't know for certain what transpired - though I have some idea, being familiar with the area. 

No, what I will do is share with you how I prepare my vehicle for this sort of thing.

While I found the driving situation stressful, at no point was I panicked. Panicked drivers end up in ditches - or worse.

1. What kind of condition is your car in? Generally speaking, you should keep a close eye on a few vehicle conditions. For starters, how worn are your tires? I drive a lot of miles, so I go through a lot of tires. Sure, I could probably let them go longer, but I transport other people all over the place all year round. I need my tire treads to be deep enough to grip the road effectively in any condition, from a 90 degree July day that turns into a stormy night (like yesterday) to an icy New Year's Eve. 

You should also make sure your windshield wipers aren't cracked, worn, or streaking. If they do any of those, it's time to replace them. 

Side note: the people who drive around with their windshield wipers running on the highest speed for the slightest drizzle drive me absolutely nuts. I have a theory that the speed of the wipers in a light rain is in direct relation to the amount of space you should give that driver in inclement weather. If they are using their delay wipers like a normal person, give them a normal amount of space. If they're burning out the wiper motor from running it on high every time a drop of rain falls from the sky, give that person as much room as possible, because they're probably the same kind of person who, rather than buckling their seat belt, lets the warning chime ding, or lives with a shrill chirp every 30 seconds instead of replacing the battery in the smoke detector. These people are inattentive and will bring society down with them if the rest of us get too close.

Also, I recommend using Rain-X on your windshield every couple of weeks. If you aren't familiar with Rain-X, it is a hydrophobic solution that is applied to your windshield to repel water. In a light-to-moderate rain, it makes wipers almost unnecessary. Last night, I'm fairly certain it saved my life... or at least my deductible, as it allowed me to swerve in time to avoid a large sign or piece of plywood being blown across the highway at my car.

2. Avoid standing water. At speeds as low as 35 mph, it can take as little as a tenth of an inch of water to hydroplane. If you start hydroplaning, take your foot off the gas and steer gently in the direction you are hydroplaning, as this allows your wheels to realign themselves. Lots of newer cars - particularly those with front wheel drive - have traction control systems that will alert and assist you with this. Don't jerk the wheel in the opposite direction, as you could make things much worse, very quickly.

Oh, and if you're on a highway during a heavy rain, stay toward the center lane, as the road is designed for the water to run off the sides. 

3. Turn on your headlights (but not your high beams!) Turning on your headlights increases visibility. In Missouri, it's actually a law that you have to have your headlights on if your wipers are on. However, there is one caveat: don't use your high beams unless you absolutely have to. And in an urban environment, you should almost never have to use your high beams. There are so many people who drive around St. Louis with their high beams on or no headlights at all. It's infuriating. 

And if you have a burned out headlight, go to AutoZone, O'Reilly, or nearly any auto parts store and replace it. The employees there will likely help you do it, too.

4. Know how your ventilation system works and use it to your advantage. This is especially true in the summer months. Your car's air conditioner and defroster will remove moisture from the air inside your car if the windows are up. This will prevent the inside of the windows from fogging. Don't be the smooth-brained idiot driving around, constantly wiping off the inside of their windshield with their hand.

5. Turn off your cruise control. Cruise control is like a toaster - it should only be used in dry conditions. 

6. Finally, if you don't have to go anywhere, stay home. I'll admit, I didn't follow my own advice on this point last night. I didn't have to go out driving, but I did. Thankfully, it all worked out fine, but everything would have been just as fine if I had stayed at home. As one of my high school teachers said, "do as I say, not as I do." 

I hope this was somewhat helpful, and I hope you have a safe, relaxing, and dry weekend.